These questions are meant to stimulate your thinking. I can argue either answer on at least one of them. But, they aren’t provocative for provocative’s sake. This is “real life” stuff. These are worth pondering because you will face these questions one way or another in life – –
These are only preliminary answers. I will blog on two of the questions each week beginning on Friday, October 30, 2009.
- Much of what Christians have been taught they should do in forgiving people can lead to bitterness. TRUE. I’ll argue here as I did in the recent Reformation 21 article that automatic forgiveness and a downplaying of justice creates resentment and bitterness.
- One author wrote, “Hell is full of forgiven people.” Is the statement, “Hell is full of forgiven people,” true or false? FALSE. To say that a person can be forgiven by God, yet still go to hell, empties biblical forgiveness of its true meaning. Update: I understand that many of you answered “True” because a person could be forgiven interpersonally and still not be forgiven by God. The question was poorly worded! I’ll say more in the post coming up.
- Local churches need to be reminded of biblical truth about forgiveness in an ongoing way. TRUE. We need to continually return to the Gospel not only in remembering how God forgives believers, but also to remind ourselves to live out the Gospel in our relationships.
- Christians should drop some matters rather than insisting that they be discussed with the other party. TRUE. Too many relationships are irreparably damaged because people carry on about trivial matters. And, honestly, most matters are trivial.
- A very influential author argued that it is legitimate to forgive God. True or False, it is legitimate to forgive God? FALSE. It is heretical to suggest that God would need our forgiveness. But, this is where a feelings based approach to forgiveness often leads.
- Ken Sande says forgiveness is a 2-stage process. Is the statement that forgiveness is a two stage process true or false? TRUE. Sande’s thoughts in The Peacemaker are recommended.
- God punishes Christians for their sins even though they are forgiven. FALSE. A distinction should be made between God’s discipline (which is future oriented) and God’s punishment.
- A person could forgive a spouse, yet still seek a divorce. TRUE. Forgiveness does not mean the elimination of consequences. While divorce is to be avoided, God does allow divorce and there comes a time in marriage when divorce is allowed.
- The best way to stop thinking about a relational hurt is to journal about how you feel. FALSE. Journaling may only cause a person to think more about the injury. Those struggling to escape from emotional quicksand should focus on Christ and be more absorbed in him.
- People unwilling or unable to forgive, should be scared of God. TRUE. In one sense we should all fear God. Those unable or unwilling to extend grace should carefully evaluate their own salvation.
- Where broken relationships are concerned, forgiveness can be unpacked in a moment. TRUE. In the first forgiveness quiz, I argued that this is true. (And, 92% of those who took the quiz agreed). But, it is also important to remember that God forgives the repentant in a moment. While emotional wounds take time to heal, it should be remembered that believers are called to commit to forgive others in the same way that God forgives us.
- A strong belief in the biblical doctrine of eternal punishment (hell) is essential if we are to avoid bitterness. TRUE. See Derek Thomas’ recent, Will a Loving God Condemn People to Hell? This is true from two perspectives. First, the Bible uses the doctrine of eternal punishment to motivate Christians to forgive the repentant (Matthew 18:21-35). Second, Christians are also called to trust in the justice of God. Vengeance belongs to Him. He will repay (Romans 12:17-21).
when broken relationships are concerned . . . . perhaps i read this more broadly then some would . . . but breaks can be extreme, and if there are extreme experiences or lengths of trauma in which the relationship has been broken, I think God’s healing, thus the forgiveness, can take more than a moment, or it may be realized – felt – over time . . . and we are trapped in time unlike God, who is without time. He does not hold us to His standard of comprehension, nor would He presume us able to fashion forgiveness on His timetable is my feeling. He made the world in seven days, but gave Himself 40 to flood it. He is a passionate God and understands anger and disappointment, and the time one needs to feel . . . and forgive fully . . . . I think.
Julie, I do agree with you. Indeed, in the original forgiveness quiz I answered this the opposite way. I did this as a discussion starter.
But I did want to make the point that with God when we turn to Him and put our faith in Christ, at that moment our sins are forgiven.
Jesus forgave all when he died for our sins. The key to living in this is salvation & lordship. I was actually forgiven before coming to salvation in Christ, I just never lived it out. If your answer were true, then forgiveness only comes into play when we get saved, but the work was finished. We are saved when we call on the name of the Lord & confess His place in our lives. Those who do end up eternally separated (hell) were fully forgiven at Calvary, but never chose it.
As for the need to be scared of God equalling the fear of the Lord, these are different altogether. I should choose to forgive because it is the right, righteous, & holy way to live. But I don’t had ego be scared of God. That’s just the wrong concept. We never obey out of being scared. We obey because He is right & submission is life-bringing, but being scared is just odd wording & teaching.
As for a strong doctrine of hell needing to be believed in to avoid bitterness, this is just odd teaching. How does this even Biblically make sense? The proper way to avoid bitterness is forgiveness, obedience, & living in Christ. If it takes a string belief in a hell doctrine to avoid sin, my motivation is way off (and it’s probably very performance oriented). God’s favor on me (grace) should motivate me to follow His teachings (obedience) & bitterness will be removed from my life as a result (sanctification). The truth of hell news to be known & learned, but to teach it is the way to not be bitter is false teaching.