Archives For Pornography

Time Magazine: PornWriting for The American Conservative, Rob Dreher interacts with a recent Time magazine article and Denny Burk.

 Time magazine’s cover story this week is about what ubiquitous hardcore pornography is doing to men. I can’t link to it because it’s a subscribers-only piece, but Southern Baptist pastor Denny Burk has a detailed (but not NSFW) rundown of what it reports. The gist of it is that porn is changing the brains of young men, who have been watching it from a young age, such that they are impotent with actual women. Burk, quoting the article:

A growing number of young men are convinced that their sexual responses have been sabotaged because their brains were virtually marinated in porn when they were adolescents. Their generation has consumed explicit content in quantities and varieties never before possible, on devices designed to deliver content swiftly and privately, all at an age when their brains were more plastic—more prone to permanent change—than in later life. These young men feel like unwitting guinea pigs in a largely unmonitored decade-long experiment in sexual conditioning.

Read the rest here.

See also:

Pornography: 8 Suggestions for Sticking a Needle In Your Eye

The Porn Free Family Plan (Tim Challies)

The Top 5 Free Ways to Protect Against Internet Pornography (Tim Michalek)

For help implementing a family policy, and for saying no to Internet enabled devices, see Parents Memorize This Speech (Chris Brauns)

Please Don’t Give Them Porn for Christmas (Tim Challies)

Parenting in a Hyper-Sexualized Culture (Heath Lambert)

The Most Insidious Drug (Chris Brauns)

What’s at Stake with Internet Pornography (Russell Moore)

Is Pornography the New Tobacco (Mary Eberstadt)

Pornography: The New Normal (Carl Trueman)

Pornography: The New Narcotic (John Piper)

Hijacking Back Your Brain from Porn (John Piper)

Porn, Pride, and Praise (Heath Lambert)

Children Playing Outside Requires Leadership. Here’s Three Suggestions (Chris Brauns)

Russell Moore: Fake Love, Fake War and the Dangers of Pornography and the Internet

Pornification: Just the Facts (Ed Stetzer)

A Study on the Effects of Pornography

Recommended Reading:

Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace (Heath Lambert)

Counsel to Men Addicted to Pornography (Ed Welch)

Pornified: How Pornography is Damaging Our Live, Our Relationships, and Our Families (Pamela Paul)

When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy (John Piper)

Wired for Intimacy. How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain (William Struthers)

Sexual Detox (an e-book by Tim Challies)

Recommended Videos:

I Am Struggling With Pornography and Need Help. What’s My First Step (Heath Lambert)

What Should I Do When My Husband is Looking at Pornography (Heath Lambert)

The Science of Pornography

You Can Say No to Porn (John Piper)

The Key to Escaping Porn (John Piper)

Tim Keller: How Does the Gospel Conquer Pornography

Don’t miss the links at the bottom of the page. There are resources available.

Jesus’s teaching on lust sets the standard. Sins of the mind are wrong. He stressed the stakes. Lust is eternally deadly. And Christ gave us a strategy: take radical action.

[27] “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ [28] But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. [29] If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. [30] And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell. Matthew 5:27-30

What does it look like to take radical action? How do we figuratively gouge out our eyes and amputate our hands? Below are 10 Policies for parents to implement to protect their families. These are not all radical in nature. Some of them take place over time. But be ready to act decisively if necessary.

  1. Be involved in a Christ-centered, Bible preaching local church. The only way we can counter the corrosive effects of a fallen world is through Christian community. You need to feed on the proclaimed Word, share life with other believers, worship Christ in community, and pray with others. If you are struggling in this area, make yourself accountable to a mature Christian very soon.
  2. Promote a positive vision for marriage and God’s plan for intimacy. Envision Christ-centered weddings.
  3. Make love — husbands and wives — a priority. Spouses belong to one another (1 Cor 7:1-5).
  4. Establish and maintain modesty standards within your family.
  5. Establish family policies early. Second grade is easier than sixth for setting boundaries. Still, it is never too late.
  6. Minimize screen time in general. Check the progression that accustoms families to always being in front of a screen. Hate addiction to video games and be scared of them in the first place. If the only way you can get work done is to occupy your children with a video, or, if you always use videos to keep children from being a distraction when you entertain, that is a problem! (Though, exceptions can be made for the sake of #3.
  7. Keep Internet access away from private contexts: especially bedrooms and basements. Sin loves darkness.
  8. Implement steps from Pastor Tim Michalek’s Top 5 Free Ways to Protect Against Internet Pornography.
  9. Question if teens really need Internet enabled phones.
  10. Avoid split second decisions about purchasing Internet enabled devices. Heed Tim Challies appeal. “Please don’t give them porn for Christmas.”

Online resources for battling pornography:

The Porn Free Family Plan (Tim Challies)

The Top 5 Free Ways to Protect Against Internet Pornography (Tim Michalek)

Circle: A Review (Darryl Dash)

For help implementing a family policy, and for saying no to Internet enabled devices, see Parents Memorize This Speech (Chris Brauns)

Please Don’t Give Them Porn for Christmas (Tim Challies)

Parenting in a Hyper-Sexualized Culture (Heath Lambert)

The Most Insidious Drug (Chris Brauns)

What’s at Stake with Internet Pornography (Russell Moore)

Is Pornography the New Tobacco (Mary Eberstadt)

Pornography: The New Normal (Carl Trueman)

Pornography: The New Narcotic (John Piper)

Hijacking Back Your Brain from Porn (John Piper)

Porn, Pride, and Praise (Heath Lambert)

Children Playing Outside Requires Leadership. Here’s Three Suggestions (Chris Brauns)

Russell Moore: Fake Love, Fake War and the Dangers of Pornography and the Internet

Pornification: Just the Facts (Ed Stetzer)

A Study on the Effects of Pornography

Recommended Reading:

Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace (Heath Lambert)

Counsel to Men Addicted to Pornography (Ed Welch)

Pornified: How Pornography is Damaging Our Live, Our Relationships, and Our Families (Pamela Paul)

When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy (John Piper)

Wired for Intimacy. How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain (William Struthers)

Sexual Detox (an e-book by Tim Challies)

Recommended Videos:

I Am Struggling With Pornography and Need Help. What’s My First Step (Heath Lambert)

What Should I Do When My Husband is Looking at Pornography (Heath Lambert)

The Science of Pornography

You Can Say No to Porn (John Piper)

The Key to Escaping Porn (John Piper)

Tim Keller: How Does the Gospel Conquer Pornography

Heath Lambert gives some very practical advice to parents of young children about how to teach about what can be an awkward subject for parents

Dr. Heath Lambert serves as Executive Director at the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors. ACBC is the largest biblical counseling organization in the world with certified counselors and counseling training centers in 17 countries. Heath also serves as Associate Professor of Biblical Counseling at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and their undergraduate institution, Boyce College where he has taught classes on biblical counseling and Christian ministry since 2006.

Heath is the author of the first book I recommend to those struggling with pornography, Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace.

Heath is not only a counselor, he is also a parent. In the below video he shares some of the practical ways he and his wife teach their young children in age appropriate ways.

Parenting in a Hyper-Sexualized Culture from Radical on Vimeo.

Q: As a father, how do you shepherd your children in our hyper-sexualized culture?

The issue of how you shepherd your children in a hyper-sexualized culture is what keeps me up at night, quite literally. I have three kids: a nine year-old boy, a four year-old boy and a six year-old daughter. I walk into their rooms and pray for them almost every night before I go to bed. And there are many things I pray for them. I pray that they will love the gospel, will love the Bible, will walk with Jesus; yet the thing I pray for almost every night is that the Lord would protect them from this pornographic culture that has a bull’s-eye on their head. I think the first thing you have to do is pray for your kids. There are so many forces after our kids and we have no control over most of those forces. As far as ministering to our children is concerned, there are a few things my wife and I do. And I don’t think I have all this figured out, so ask me again in ten to fifteen years and maybe I’ll have something more to say. But, here are the main things we are doing:

First, we talk about modesty all the time. When we are in our house, we dress modestly. I am modest in our house, my wife is modest in our house and we make sure our kids are modest in our house. We do that on purpose not because we are being prudish, but because we want to occasion the opportunity to talk about the godliness of modesty—the godliness of being covered up. It’s a way to express care to others.

When we talk about modesty, it gives us a starting point.

Read more here.

Carl Trueman concludes an excellent post reflecting on the British response to with these sobering words:

Internet pornography is probably the number one pastoral problem in the world today.  I wonder if it is set to become yet more so: as the social shame dimension passes away, it will be harder to maintain discipline on this issue.  The Christian church is currently mesmerized by developments relative to sexuality, not least because these development are couched in the rhetoric of civil rights and have serious legal implications. I wonder if a more serious and lethal internal issue for the church will actually turn out to be pornography.   Holding the line on this will probably not come with direct legal and financial penalties attached; but when even The Spectator carries not one but two articles in a single week which assume the harmless normality of porn consumption, the pastoral challenge of preaching and maintaining basic sexual purity in the church is set to escalate beyond our wildest nightmares.

Read the whole thing here.

http://media.zondervan.com/images/product/original/9780310499244.JPGDr. Heath Lambert has written an extremely important book which will be coming out in August.

When I left for college over 30 years ago, the biggest threats to young men were substance abuse, alcoholism, and promiscuity. But in the Internet Age, a new menace may have moved to the front of the pack. I now wonder if pornography is the biggest threat to our young men.

I understand that pornography also threatens young women. But my inclination is that it is still a more significant threat for young men. What do you think?

I am increasingly warning the people in our church about pornography. I can think of multiple times in the last week when I have talked to people about its dangers.

All of which is to say, I am so thankful that Heath Lambert has written what I believe will be a “go-to” book for those who want to defeat pornography but do not know how to fight with the power of grace.

Here is the description of Finally Free given by the publisher:

If you have struggled personally against the powerful draw of pornography, or if you have ever tried to help someone fighting this battle, you know how hard it is to break free. But real freedom isn’t found by trying harder to change. Nor is it found in a particular method or program. Only Jesus Christ has the power to free people from the enslaving power of pornography. In Finally Free, Dr. Heath Lambert, a leader in the biblical counseling movement, lays out eight gospel-centered strategies for overcoming the deceitful lure of pornography. Each chapter clearly demonstrates how the gospel applies to this particular battle and how Jesus can move readers from a life of struggle to a life of purity. If you or someone you care about is fighting this battle, there is good news: No matter how intense or long-standing the struggle, Jesus Christ can, will, and does set people free from the power of pornography. ‘I’ve read just about every Christian book on the topic of pornography. Finally Free is now the number one book I will recommend to pastors, counselors, strugglers, and those who love them. – Bob Kellemen, Ph.D., Executive Director, The Biblical Counseling Coalition; Author, Sexual Abuse: Beauty for Ashes ‘This book is richly biblical, soundly Christian, and centered in the gospel. Christians should read it and quickly pass it to others. It will be of enormous help to pastors, youth ministers, college ministers, and the Christians of all ages struggling against the tide of our pornographic age.’ – R. Albert Mohler Jr., president Southern Baptist Theological Seminary

See also:

The Most Foreign Concept In the American Church is the Most Important One To Help People Become “Finally Free” from Porn

Help Men (and Women) Fight Porn with the Power of Grace and “Finally Free” (By Heath Lambert)

How Sorrow Helps Men (and Women) Fight Porn and Become “Finally Free” (By Heath Lambert)

 

The Science of Pornography

Chris —  February 22, 2013 — 1 Comment

The problem of pornography is epidemic. Here is a scientific explanation of its dangers. I have not confirmed the scientific claims of this video.

HT: Challies

Counsel to Men Addicted to Pornography from Desiring God on Vimeo.

Russell Moore:

You know the guy I’m talking about. He spends hours into the night playing video games and surfing for pornography. He fears he’s a loser. And he has no idea just how much of a loser he is. For some time now, studies have shown us that porn and gaming can become compulsive and addicting. What we too often don’t recognize, though, is why.

In a new book, The Demise of Guys: Why Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It, psychologists Philip Zimbardo and Nikita Duncan say we may lose an entire generation of men to pornography and video gaming addictions. Their concern isn’t about morality, but instead about the nature of these addictions in reshaping the patten of desires necessary for community.

If you’re addicted to sugar or tequila or heroin you want more and more of that substance. But porn and video games both are built on novelty, on the quest for newer and different experiences. That’s why you rarely find a man addicted to a single pornographic image. He’s entrapped in an ever-expanding kaleidoscope.

There’s a key difference between porn and gaming. Pornography can’t be consumed in moderation because it is, by definition, immoral. A video game can be a harmless diversion along the lines of a low-stakes athletic competition. But the compulsive form of gaming shares a key element with porn: both are meant to simulate something, something for which men long. . . .

Read the rest.

Pornification: The Facts

Chris —  August 10, 2011 — Leave a comment

Ed Stetzer with a sobering summary:

Sexual lust has been present with us since the early days of humanity. But in our modern era we are faced with free, 24/7, private access to images not fit to describe.  The Boston Globe online notes,

Not too long ago, pornography was a furtive profession, its products created and consumed in the shadows. But it has steadily elbowed its way into the limelight, with an impact that can be measured not just by the Internet-fed ubiquity of pornography itself but by the way aspects of the porn sensibility now inform movies, music videos, fashion, magazines, and celebrity culture.” [Boston Globe]

 Of people who use the Internet, 43% visit pornographic websites. Some 40 million Americans are regular visitors to porn sites, with pornographic downloads represent 35% of all Internet downloads. Of the 40 million regular visitors, 33% are woman, while 70% of men aged 18-24 visit porn sites monthly. [Gizmodo reference below]  It’s not just adults.  “Sex” and “porn” are among the top 5 most frequently searched terms for children under 18. Only 3% of adult websites require verification of age before viewing and some of those merely say, “Are you over 18? Click HERE if yes.”  [Online Education]

 The passion for pornographic images and the corresponding consequences have been around since the beginning of recorded civilization. Phone porn and sexting did not create the pornification phenomena but does enhance the problem. By the way, in a 2009 Harris Survey, 19% of teens surveyed have engaged in sexting. . .

Read the rest here.

Arousing ourselves to death

Chris —  May 4, 2011 — 1 Comment

Kill this or it will kill you. Beat to death with a shovel if you have to as described here.  Kill it in any case.

Russell Moore writes about how churches should deal with the pornography epidemic:

The couple will typically tell me first about how stressful their lives are. Maybe he’s lost his job. Perhaps she’s working two. Maybe their children are rowdy or the house is chaotic. But usually, if we talk long enough about their fracturing marriage, there is a sense that something else is afoot. The couple will tell me about how their sex life is near extinction. The man, she’ll tell me, is an emotional wraith, dead to intimacy with his wife. The woman will be frustrated, with what seems to him to be a wild mixture of rage and humiliation. They just don’t know what’s wrong, but they know a Christian marriage isn’t supposed to feel like this.

It’s at this point that I interrupt the discussion, look at the man, and ask, “So how long has the porn been going on?” The couple will look at each other, and then look at me, with a kind of fearful incredulity that communicates the question, “How do you know?” For a few minutes, they seek to reorient themselves to this exposure, wondering, I suppose, if I’m an Old Testament prophet or a New Age psychic. But I’m not either. One doesn’t have to be to sense the spirit of this age. In our time, pornography is the destroying angel of (especially male) Eros, and it’s time the Church faced the horror of this truth.

A Perversion of the Good

In one sense, the issue of pornography is not new at all. . .

Read the whole thing here.